Admir “Ado” Camdzic is an Bosnian dude. He likes to think he can play guitar, though he really can't. Ado met the maker of this site on the hellhole that is msn. Mike used to make Ado chili every saturday night, and they'd play starfox together till the early hours of morning. He can't compose for shit, he just hopes to rip off Mike's ideas and tell everyone he made it all. Everything he does is for the lulz. write i used to be a transvestite prostitute on the streets of miami

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Andrew is an unstoppable force of nature. When he masturbates the kinetic energy of it causes tsunamis to form and wipe out life and all traces of it on other worlds which is why no scientist on Earth has ever found life on another planet yet. If you ever stare into his eyes for exactly 12 seconds, peanut butter will start to ooze out of your thumb.

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Josh hails from Greenville, South Carolina and is the only normal and sane one of us all. He however has the super power of being able to out drink anyone and has a super human immunity to alcohol poisoning. His immunity is so powerful he can't even be poisoned at all for that matter and food poisoning just causes him to feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Too bad for all you ladies out there who were wanting to marry him and then poison him for his huge life insurance premium which doesn't exist. He rose to fame in the McDonald's community for how awesome his review of their burgers was that he left on an answering machine. He has so many guitars that one time when he cut all his fingers off by accident he just used some of his guitars to replace all ten of his fingers until they could be reattached. He is the final boss of guitars everywhere, Alcoholics Anonymous and McDonald's. Josh runs his own band project called Eternal Infamy which you can check out on the side bar.

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Mike Crain was born from the left nostril of the carving of George Washington's nose at Mt. Rushmore and has power to rival that of Galactus himself. In fact he actually is Galactus, but human beings have degraded so much he appears as a 14 year old possibly gender confused fag to humanity. Mike can manipulate all aspects of reality at will. He decided to form Fifth Independent one day so he'd have a band name to release songs under to sound cooler than he actually is. He met the other members of the band in his travels all over the world and secretly owns a piece of each of their souls so he can force them to write music for him and claim it entirely as his own. Mike, much like Andrew, is an unstoppable force of nature. One time when he took viagra his penis shot up into outer space and was suppose to stay in orbit but unexpectedly flew back into Earth's gravitational pull and destroyed the Earth. Mike was saddened by this so he restored the Earth like nothing ever happened.

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I am a mongoose from twelve million years in the future. Sure my profile said on the even shittier designed website I'm not even born yet, but that's just because I can travel through time. I come from the future to steal all your Chicken McNuggets and broom sticks. I am afraid of seeing lawns get cut. My friends all told me I was a fool and forced me to go into the lawn mowing business, but I just couldn't do it! So I invented time traveling machines which are implanted directly into the penis of people who wish to have it just so I can get a laugh out of their penis being warped through time without them. My time machine which is my hat is the only functioning one and it works by inserting chocolate quarters into the LAWL sign, which will then change to ROFL and BOOM! I'm zapping by faster than inverted fat ass women racing ass deep in the mud. I met Mike Crain one day in my time traveling adventures when he was going to eat the mobius time continuum because it looked like a giant soft pretzel. I convinced him not to do it because he's timetose intolerant and would have horrible shits and he thanked me and wished for me to join Fifth Independent which I did. I secretly travel to the past and place every song idea into his head but shhhh… don't tell him.

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Tyson McAuley likes licking a nerd who was abducted by UFOs with Elvis and Iron Maiden. Tyson McAuley likes licking this cat in heat because my mind constantly wanders back to a mouthy marmot. Lick Nintendo who never checked on their pet which is a Lunchables Deluxe pack. You mother fucker, did you study about Tyson McAuley's penis because it feels like a party with testicular health. Green hippos always sleep on a can of Chef BoyArdee because you can never trust a retarded donkey. Don't accept sexual favors from Tyson McAuley's penis so that the Swiss Bankers lose their cutting edge in a foreskin. Andrew Barley plays drums for Tyson McAuley and it will die from an infection caused by a flying toaster. Mike Crain runs from Tyson McAuley because it's enough to cause the fusion of buffalos three to five times larger than the average T-Rex nostril. I often think about Tyson McAuley who never brings anything to the dinner table except a Secret Taco Nazi.

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